Interview conducted by Sharona Cohen
Miriam Drori, author of the new book "Every Day is a Diamond" - a collection of Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach's teachings to enhance the Sefirat HaOmer with soulful Torahs, hasidic stories, and easy to understand metaphors - shares her personal experiences with Reb Shlomo, why she decided to write a book for the Omer, and blessings for coming home to Israel.
Sharona Cohen: Tell me about your childhood (where you grew up, family life, non/religious life, education, etc)
Miriam Drori: I was born in Israel in the mid-70s into a Russian Jewish family. My parents came from the Soviet Union with almost no knowledge of Judaism. Before they got married, two weeks after my father made Aliyah, he met Reb Shlomo Carlebach. He was magnetized by him, by his singing, and he went to attend one of Reb Shlomo's concerts. Those concerts were always very long, so there was always an intermission, at which point Reb Shlomo would greet everyone. My father was handicapped when he arrived in Israel; he was injured in the war against the Germans, and then was in concentration camps for 10 years. At the time, he didn't have a leg and didn't yet have a prothesis.
During the intermission my father pushed his way to Reb Shlomo, and as he describes it, "The crowd split open like the Yam Suf [the Red Sea]" to make way for this one-legged man on crutches. When my father reached Reb Shlomo, he said to him, "I know you're needed around the world, but there's one place where you're needed the most - Moscow. The Jews there need you more than anything." This was in the early 1970s, at the height of Soviet Communism. Reb Shlomo replied that he would gladly go, but couldn't imagine how. My father told him that if Reb Shlomo was willing to go, he would arrange it.
Reb Shlomo had to hide his peyot and wear a hat instead of a kippah, and he left his guitar behind so that the authorities wouldn't question why he was bringing it. To make a long story short, a couple weeks after meeting my father, Reb Shlomo was giving a concert outside the main synagogue in Moscow to tens of thousands of people, including even some non-Jews. It was one of the most essential events that connected Russian Jewry back to Judaism. A couple days later Reb Shlomo was thrown out of the country. And it was the beginning of a wonderful friendship between him and my father.
My mother was first introduced to the idea of what it meant to be a Jew in 1967, after the Six Dar War. It was the first time Jews in Russia spoke about Israel as the Jewish homeland. She made Aliyah in 1972, and a couple years later my parents got married.
As a young child, my parents would go to the Moshav [ed. note: Moshav Mevo Modi'im where Shlomo Carlebach lived] for Shabbat services and dinner. In some years, the Moshav had guest houses and my parents would stay overnight. But other years they would travel back home after the Friday night meal. I was sent to religious school as a child, so around 3rd or 4th grade I remember learning about Shabbat laws and realizing I'm not supposed to get in a car, so I refused to go back with them one Friday night when I was nine. Needless to say, my parents didn't like that. I went to Reb Shlomo in tears and told him I didn't want to get in the car on Shabbat. Reb Shlomo was a very peaceful person and he knew how to make peace with everyone. He spoke to my parents and for the next fews years, when my parents traveled home on Friday nights, I would stay at his house on the Moshav. I became very close to him during that time and took the opportunity to learn as much as I could from him. Around the age of 12 he told me I couldn't stay at his house anymore and he arranged for me to stay with other families on the Moshav.
And that was the beginning of my religious journey. My parents obviously weren't Shabbat observant; they would make kiddush with the TV on in the background. So I would often spend Shabbats in my room singing Reb Shlomo's Shabbat melodies. My parents gave me a hard time about being religious and it was very difficult for me. But it also on that foundation that I began to search for answers to some of life's most existential questions, and it ultimately brought me even closer to Yiddishkeit.
SC: How were you first introduced to Reb Shlomo?
MD: The first time I met Reb Shlomo I was two years old. My parents had been listening to his tapes since I was a baby. But when I was two they took me for the first time to one of his concerts. When I heard him start singing, apparently I stopped whatever I was doing immediately and ran to the stage and hugged his leg. I had an intuitive connection to prayer and to HaShem through Reb Shlomo's music.
SC: How long have you been working as a life coach and speaker? How did you get into that field?
MD: I studied psychology and learned a lot from my courses, but at one point I felt like I had to take a break and I did a detour to PR. I worked in PR for a few years, but I ultimately decided that I needed to return to my initial dream of helping people, which is what I always wanted - to grow, to explore life, to find meaning and joy, and to make this world a better place. I finished my psychology degree, and began working as a life coach, and I've been working in the field for 20-something years.
SC: Tell me about your new book “Every Day is a Diamond”. And what inspired you to write about the Omer?
MD: I am very connected to the prayer Elokai Neshama [ed. note: Morning prayer thanking G-d for returning the soul to the body upon awakening] - to wake up every morning and to realize that another day that HaShem has given to us is another day not to be taken for granted. Every day is a diamond and every day has to be filled with meaning. And we gain a deeper understanding of this with Sefirat HaOmer, because every day we're counting a different attribute. So if today is hessed sh'b'hessed, and tomorrow is gvura sh'b'hessed, then I have to work on hessed sh'b'hessed today because tomorrow I'll have to work on something else and this day will be gone. I have to take this moment. Every moment of our lives has to be taken seriously, and we need to do the right thing with it. The Rambam says that the greatest prophecy in the world is not to know what will be in the future, but rather to live in the most perfect way possible in this moment. And the Sefirat HaOmer gives us the opportunity to understand this in a greater way, it gives us a greater power to take it seriously and really do the best we can with every single moment.
My first book was about prayer, and this second book is about giving every moment meaning. I want people to not take time for granted. When our soul is returned to us every morning, we must do the best we can with it. And I want to give people the tools to achieve that. Everything in the book is what gave me the tools to grow in my own life, and to take life and time seriously, and to interact with people from a healthier place, to look at my attributes, to examine them and to know in a deeper way how I can use my attributes that HaShem has put in my soul to make my life better, to love myself in a healthier way, to love everyone around me in a better way, to love HaShem, and to love the reality of creation around me in a wiser way. I want to share all of this knowledge and that's what I did with this book.
SC: Can you share a teaching from your new book?
MD: "What is the foundation of a healthy emotional life?
There are some people who criticize everything and every being. Others love everybody and do not see the wrongdoings of people around them. Both outlooks are problematic. The outlook that is needed is from the understanding of the concept of Yesod, which means making peace between contradictions.
Peace means that I see everything, but I also see beyond it. As we saw from the Hebrew word ‘Sky’, even fire and water can make peace and coexist.
Our father Jacob knows exactly when to show love and when to show boundaries. But Yoseph is beyond that. Yoseph is love and boundaries at the same time. Yoseph is like the foundation of a house. You cannot have a house stand on one pillar. Metaphorically speaking - either on the foundation of love or on the foundation of boundaries. You have to have it stand on all four pillars at the same time, simultaneously. Just like a house needs four pillars a person needs to have all the attributes refined and work in the right balance with each other."
From my new book 'Every Day is a Diamond'
Available Now in English or Hebrew
SC: If you could relay one message to our readers, what would it be?
MD: Reb Shlomo used to say that it's not enough to want to make Aliyah, you need to hear HaShem's calling, to hear Israel's calling. Sometimes people who made Aliyah can be a little judgmental about people who haven't, and I want to be careful not to do that. But I do want to bless the people abroad that they should hear Israel calling them, and HaShem should open up the gates for everybody to go up to Israel, and for us to all be together. It's our only home and I bless everyone to come home. Reb Shlomo used to say that we can't really tell anyone else what to do, we can only bless each other. So I bless everyone to return home.