The Bet El Yeshiva site's Hebrew Q&A page is a free service and resource that currently has almost 100,000 questions asked by Israelis all over the country on over 550 topics, and over 50 Rabbanim who take the time and consideration to respond. The Q&A site's English counterpart has almost 9,000 questions asked, on over 560 topics, and with 20 Rabbanim who respond.
The following are questions posted on the Hebrew Q&A page (translated to English) by the same young man over a 7-month period.
Elul 5780/Aug-Sep 2020
My name is Daniel and I come from a completely secular background. 6 years ago, after my Bar Mitzvah, I began to get curious about religion and I turned to the yeshiva.co site. Happily, I was privileged to receive from you an amazing answer, and you referred me to the book “Peninei Halakhah,” and since then, Barukh HaShem, I have been trying to make brakhot (because I received answers to my questions).
Slowly I got stronger and stronger and I always received beautiful answers from you (most of the time I didn’t address the specific question to you, but I was anyway privileged to read the amazing answers).
I continued to get stronger, and again I stumbled into a dilemma about which type of yeshiva to go to…I returned to the yeshiva.co site and I was privileged to receive from you several points for thought, and eventually, just as you advised me, “Man does not study Torah except in the place his heart desires,” and today Barukh HaShem, thanks in part to you, I got to a good place.
So I actually don’t have a question this time…I just wanted to share with you what’s going on with me and most importantly, to thank you. Thank you very much for bringing me the most foundational basics, from a young boy searching for his way, to a young man who merited a full “return” to Torah observance and to learning in a Torah place Barukh HaShem. Thank you for all the tips, patience, caring, and guidance that lasted for 6 years… it is very much appreciated!
Tishrei 5781/Sep-Oct 2020
I am a Torah observant person from a completely secular home. I am, Barukh HaShem, studying in a religious place and I'm slowly learning everything there…But because of the semester break and also because of Covid-19 it seems Sukkot celebrations will not be held there and I have no idea at all what I am supposed to do on Sukkot, and how to celebrate alone, especially if it is a bit problematic for me to obtain a Sukkah / if I will be in quarantine during the holiday?
Iyar 5781/Apr-May 2021
I became Torah observant about 7 months ago. I started my journey very slowly. I am learning in a religious framework. Every day that passes I get stronger and stronger. But when I go home I do not succeed in staying observant because my family is secular and I fall.
Sabbaths - I return home for the Sabbaths and I have nothing to do and it breaks me. I don’t have friends to hang out with. I’m not able to make sure I have kosher food for the Sabbath - pre-prepared food is very expensive, it can cost up to 600 NIS for pre-prepared kosher food and I don’t have a budget for this for every Sabbath that I return home. And there is no consideration from my family.
Kashering dishes - It’s not relevant because my family doesn’t care, and within a few hours everything becomes not kosher again and I have no way to prepare kosher food.
I don’t have a room to be in - my brother and I are in the living room. So they turn on the TV - I have to hear three televisions, and I have no where to escape for some quiet. I’m not allowed to request that they lower the volume and therefore it’s hard for me to concentrate on learning by myself. And also the computer - music, computer games at a high volume, and I’m not allowed to request that it be lowered.
They turn off the light in the bathroom and I’m not allowed to ask them to turn it on, and even if they do turn it on anyway, I’m not allowed to take enjoyment from the desecration of the Sabbath. Sometimes they even accidentally unplug the hot plate and then I’m not allowed to plug it back in.
Speaking with my family - I did this, but it didn’t help. They want to live as they usually do and I understand them, they are right.
Going elsewhere to learn - At some point it is tiring and hard to concentrate with so many distractions.
Going for a walk - How far can I possibly go? And to be alone? It gets boring fast.
It’s true that the fact that the TV is on doesn’t constitute a desecration of the Sabbath, but it does hurt my Sabbath experiences and causes me to fall intentionally, on purpose, and then this breaks me.
And so I begin the new week, broken from the Sabbath, from a damaged Sabbath atmosphere - it’s impossible to do this alone! I fall alone and fail! When I am in a religious and supportive environment I do succeed. And so begins each week - I am not allowed to join the minyanim, because desecraters of the Sabbath cannot join a minyan (sometimes I desecrate the Sabbath intentionally, because I am broken and it’s hard for me to be alone) - and I give up on Tefillah, until I observe the Sabbath regularly…and this breaks me.
And keeping kosher in the home - There is no way to get kosher food and I have no budget or friends to help me - I am alone in this task. And I cannot say blessings over non-kosher food, so even this I can’t do, and this breaks me, it crushes me.
Holidays - I have nowhere to be. I don’t know what to do. Rabbi, I am broken. My biggest dream for 7 years is to become Torah observant. When the dream was fulfilled I found that it is hard, too hard on my own. When I come home I become a secular guy with a kippah and it’s shocking. What should I do Rabbi? Give up? Take a break until I can do everything on my own? This breaks me. I want my entire life to be religious, even at home! I have no way, I have nowhere to go…
Thank you!
(The rabbi was in contact with him for a long time, and guided him to find a place of learning - he was originally in a Haredi framework that did not suit him and preferred a pre-military Yeshiva - guided him in deliberations regarding becoming Torah observant, and highly recommended a permanent Rabbi who would help him with his family and progress.)